On non-humans and etiquette…

My new car has roaches.

As I have noted before, in Hawai’i, this is no big deal.  There are roughly 83 varieties (I am underestimating) sharing this island w/ me right now.  What IS a big deal is that they have gone back on their end of our deal.

I don’t go out and play in their shit heaps, and they don’t go into my spaces.  If I go into their shit heaps, they are free to kill me, and vice versa.  This is why I have felt no shame whatsoever in smashing their babies all over the place lately.  

Last week two of the neighbors on our street had their houses tented (another normal thing around here), but I really honestly think the polite thing to do is give your neighbor, especially your immediate next door neighbor (I am talking to YOU pot smoking land lord calling early morning lawn work doing even though some of us are clearly military on shift work neighbors) if you are doing so.  Those ass hole roaches have to go some where…and it will inevitably be the first non fumigated place they find.  

AKA, my house and, and apparently, new (in April new) Ford Escape Hybrid (some of you remember my old car trying to kill me).

So a couple of weeks ago I had spotted one or two smallish ones in the car early morning/early night.  Nice normal bug times.  No big.  We cleaned a big of excess stuff out of the car and bombed it.  This past weekend I bring some things in from the car, some things that were previously packed in the house, taken to another house, unpacked, repacked, put back in the car, and when unpacked in our house again, they had stow aways.

Seriously.

And now the car has them again.

But not only do we have roaches in the car again, but now they seem to be cocky and bold.  It is one thing for a roach to be all brave during the pre dawn and pre nightfall moments, but it is another thing altogether for multiple roaches to get all gutsy and hang out on the dash board WHILE I AM DRIVING!!!1!ONE!

This is unacceptable.

I took the car in to get it detailed today (something we have to do for the Korea shipment anyhow, I just did it early and paid a little more than I was ready to right now), and tomorrow I will double bomb it again.

But it is almost like the roaches are all hopped up on bomb fumes.  It is almost as if I should be scared that if I am bitten by one that I don’t need to fear nuclear holocaust.  Like I might become the Spiderman of the roach world.

And I am even more scared that my brain went there just now.

Oy w/ the poodles already.