Smeyer owes me $.29

Which might not seem like a lot of money, but in this economy people need to save what they can.  

Allow me to explain.

At the end of chapter 3 (“The End”) of New Moon, Edward tells Bella that, b/c of the things that transpired at her birthday party (a party she adamantly did not want), AKA “The Paper Cut of Near Tragedy” he and his family have decided to leave Forks for good.  No, Bella is not going w/ them.  In fact, it has been decided on her behalf by his family that Bella would be better off if she had never met them, as if they had never existed in her life at all.  He is breaking up w/ her and leaving her to pursue a happier and safely more human life.  If you are following along at home then you know that I believe that Edward continues to take away Bella’s agency irrespective of what Bella actually desires for her own life.  He continually refuses to take her feelings and desires into consideration while making major life decisions on her behalf.  Being w/o him must be for her own good b/c he has decided it to be so.

Bella collapses to the ground and is rescued from the woods by local Rez good by Sam Uley, and taken home to her father, Charlie.  Charlie is understandably angry w/ Edward for leaving Bella in a near catatonia in the woods, and is equally confused as to the Cullens’ sudden departure from Forks.

Upon regaining consciousness Bella has an epiphany about what Edward said in the woods: “It will be like I never existed”.  She races upstairs to find her personal items, photos, a CD made by Edward of his own compositions, and a few other things are missing from her room, part of the erasure process.  The scene closes w/ Charlie hearing that the local boys from the Rez are having a bonfire party celebrating the Cullens’ departure.

And then, the book goes blank.

For eight pages.

Ha!  I see what you did there, Smeyer!  You are so clever!

Instead of attempting to write what a devastating loss feels like to a young girl who has wrapped her whole life around the object lost, she just leave eight pages blank.

You lose 50 DKP b/c you didn’t know what the fuck to do!

Doing a little quick math, I divided the $19.99 spent on this book, divided it by the 563 numbered pages (this doesn’t include the entire chapter preview at the end which isn’t numbered), and multiplied that by 8 pages, and rounded up slightly to get $.29.  That is amount that every person who purchased New Moon has been cheated by poor literary skills.  I am calling for an immediate refund of $.29 to everyone who purchased New Moon prior to this post, since now there is referenced warning of said highway robbery.

So, thanks, Smeyer, for that cute little trick.  I am sure that all the trees that died to pull off your lazy stunt are thankful to be a part of this process.

Previous New Moon blogging here and here.